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C-Sections are Beautiful

Today I am writing because of how I am feeling. I am a little sad and frustrated. Exactly 2 weeks ago today at my 36 weeks doctor appointment we heard the news that our precious baby girl is still in a breech position. So, this means that we had 2 options, we could try and have our doctor physically flip her (ECV) or we will have to get a C-section. I came home and bawled, I was so scared and worried. A C-section is a huge abdominal surgery! I was so sad that every image I had of my birth was disappearing. I had no clue what my birth experience was going to be like now. I was incredibly thankful that my baby girl was healthy and I was healthy, but honestly that made me feel like I should still be able to have a vaginal birth! But, it wasn’t an option anymore unless baby girl decided to flip before the planned surgery.

Now, after speaking to many many people who had the exact same scenario as me or very similar, I have a better understanding and knowledge about c-sections and this has helped me tremendously in preparing for my planned c-section. I read in Karrie Locher’s blog this sentence about c-sections, and it truly spoke to me, “It’s also absolutely normal and okay to look forward to your c-section birth, too!” She summarized exactly how I have been feeling in one sentence. I was so sick of telling people I have to get a c-section because everyone's first reaction is “Oh no I am so sorry.” The worst was when someone told me “Oh how sad you will never be able to have a normal birth again.” The stigma around c-sections is so frustrating. C-sections save lives, and c-sections are just as beautiful as any other birth, c-sections are birth! You are still delivering a child into this world, and that is a beautiful thing.

Even my own family members express how badly they feel for me that I have to get a c-section and honestly, I want to look at them and say why? I am healthy, and my baby is healthy, so why are you sorry? (I know that this isn’t the case for a lot of c-sections, but for me this is my experience.) And yes at first I did grieve the fact that I won’t have the vaginal birth experience that I thought I would have. And that’s okay. I have come to understand and see how amazing c-section births are.

Honestly, because of how everyone reacts to me telling them about my planned c-section and from the stigma around c-sections, I felt guilty every time I would start to get excited about my c-section. Can you believe that? I would feel like I was a failure and had given up and feel guilty like I can’t be excited for my own child's birth.

I haven’t experienced this yet, but it is planned, and yes when we planned it I came home so freaking excited and feeling so ready. I can’t wait that in 10 days I get to deliver my child into this world. C-section or not, you can still look forward to your birth experience.

I am talking about this today so that people stop having such a negative outlook on c-sections. Did you know that 30% of babies are born with c-section. That means out of 10 pregnant women, at least 3 of them will have a c-section delivery. That is a lot of people! Why is it still looked at so negatively? Maybe it’s because the situation around why you have to get a c-section is oftentimes stressful and scary. Or maybe it’s because it's not the way “nature intended it”. But after talking to a lot of mommas who have had c-sections, they all are so thankful and grateful for them. Some women even love them more than vaginal deliveries!

One of my really good friends found out that she had placenta previa about 20 weeks into her pregnancy and had to have a planned c-section. I remember looking back to when she told me and I reacted exactly how everyone else has reacted to me. I reacted with a sad negative tone. In reality, if it weren’t for my friend's c-section, my friend and her baby would have died. It saved her life and her baby’s. I wish I could go back to her and express my concern for her situation, but be excited for her that she still gets to deliver her baby healthy. Shouldn’t that be something we are cheering for when people tell us? Instead of having a sad tone in your voice, be understanding and happy for them that they have an option to still have a beautiful birth! “Oh wow, I am so glad that you will still get to deliver a healthy and beautiful baby.” or “Wow, aren’t we thankful for modern medicine so that you can still deliver that baby.” I just don’t agree with looking at the actual c-section as a negative thing, because it isn’t.

So next time your friend, family member or you hear someone has to get a c-section or got a c-section, remember this, they deserve to feel excited and thankful for the delivery of their baby, no matter how that happened.

And I know mine hasn’t happened yet… but I can say with everything in my heart that I am so excited for the birth of my baby. And I am so thankful that we have an option to have a beautiful delivery even though she is breech.

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